Alec Baldwin’s wife, Hilaria, is shedding light on the emotional turmoil he faced after the tragic Rust shooting—revealing that he struggled with intense “survivor’s guilt” in the aftermath.
On episode 2 of The Baldwins, the couple’s TLC reality series, Hilaria, 41, opened up about the heartbreaking messages she received from Alec, 66, just a day after the October 2021 incident.
Baldwin was rehearsing for the Western film in New Mexico when a prop gun he was holding fired accidently, fatally shooting cinematographer Halyna Hutchins and injuring director Joel Souza.
The actor has maintained that he never pulled the trigger and was unaware the gun contained live ammunition instead of dummy rounds.
“I found these text messages the other day between us, you know, the day after,” Hilaria recalled on camera. “And [Alec] said he wanted to kill himself.”
In a confessional moment, she elaborated on the deep grief her husband has carried ever since.
“You’re involved in this thing that nobody could even possibly imagine. And so he goes back to that day, he wishes it were him. He would change places [with Hutchins] in a second.”
The Baldwins’ new TLC series, which premiered on Feb. 23, follows Alec, Hilaria, and their seven children as they navigate life in New York City.
(Alec is also father to daughter Ireland Baldwin, whom he shares with ex-wife Kim Basinger.)
The show also offers an intimate look at how the Rust shooting—and Alec’s involuntary manslaughter trial, which was dismissed last July—impacted the Baldwin family.